May 3-4

I was pretty busy yesterday, so I didn't get a chance to post yesterday's picture. But I definitely made sure to take it!

The subject for May 3 was "something I wore today." I chose to feature a piece of jewelry that I wore. I own three rings that are really special to me, and I'm almost always wearing one of them. Yesterday, I wore the ring that my Grandma Elsie gave me for my 13th birthday. There is one jewel mounted in the ring. It's cut in the shape of a heart, and apparently, it is my birthstone.

My birthstone is a rather funny thing. You see, my birthstone changes colors. I have various pieces of jewelry featuring my birthstone, but they're all different colors. Ice blue, turquoise, purplish-blue, just plain blue. I should really look into this. Does the stone just come in different colors or are some people seriously confused? I don't know.

Anyway, this ring is special to me because it was from my Grandma Elsie. She passed away when I was just 16, so everything I have that reminds me of her is especially precious to me. Grandma's present was sweet and elegant and sort of a coming-of-age present for me. I felt so important, so grown-up when I received that ring. I still wear it with pride, and every time I look at it, I think of Grandma.

I miss her. I wish she was here to see me today. I wish she was here to see that little girl all grown-up.

May 4: Fun!

I had a lot of fun today, so it was rather difficult trying to narrow it down to one picture. Probably the best thing I did was just take it easy. I finished up my semester yesterday, and it felt so good to do nothing. No responsibilities. Nowhere to be. Just time to relax.

My mom and I spent the morning perusing Michael's and Hobby Lobby, one of our favorite things to do together. We picked up some super cute decorations for my sister's after-grad party, and I found all of the supplies I need to make my Mother's Day present. I thought about putting a picture on here of the items I bought (as it was very fun to decide on which things to buy), but then I decided I better not if I want to keep it a surprise to my mom. You never know when she'll drop in on my blog! ;) Maybe I'll post pictures of the finished product.

In the afternoon, I spent my time planning and dreaming about our family's next Walt Disney World vacation. If you know me, you know how I love Disney. In fact, one of my friends once told me that if Walt Disney World was a man, I would marry him. To that I replied, "Of course!" If there was a man with that much creativity and attention to detail wrapped up inside of him, I would nab him for sure. ;)

When thinking about Disney World, I usually like to watch Disney tour DVDs, check out the Disney website, read the Disney Parks Blog, or watch those good, old classic Disney movies (which we still have on VHS, I might add). Today, I spent my time reading our numerous issues of the Disney magazine "Celebrations."

This magazine is phenomenal! If you are a fellow Disney-lover, do yourself a favor and get a subscription to this magazine. It is well-worth the price. The articles and photography are top-notch. It's a dream of mine to one day write an article for this magazine.

So, I read through our most current issue and two of the back issues that we have collected. It was so much fun! I learned some new things that I hadn't picked up on during my first reading. I read about the elaborate construction of Spaceship Earth at Epcot (affectionately known as "the Ball" to many fans), the detailed art of The Tree of Life at Animal Kingdom, and the ingenious development of Finding Nemo: The Musical, also found at Animal Kingdom, along with numerous other tidbits of valuable Disney knowledge. Definitely my idea of fun!

People may think I'm crazy for loving Disney so much at my age, but I say Disney is not just for kids, it's for the kids at heart.

May 2: Skyline

Today's theme is the skyline.

This is my skyline. And I really can't think of any better type of skyline (except maybe one that includes mountains and pine trees). I don't want any skyscrapers. I don't want a busy city. I don't want hundreds of people. Those things are nice to see and maybe enjoy for a short time, but what I really want are trees and stars and soothing nighttime noises.

I am so blessed to have these beautiful trees lining the back of my house. No skyscrapers or homes or people. Just trees. I wouldn't have it any other way.

May 1: Peace

So, I decided to try one of these picture challenges I've been hearing about. The goal of the project is to take one picture a day that corresponds with a certain theme. I found a photo challenge for the month of May on Pinterest and decided to give it a shot. Who knows if I'll complete them all or even post all of the pictures on here, but it sounded like something fun to do. I think this would be a really great idea for a scrapbook later on when I have some more time.

Anyway, the theme for May 1 is Peace. The most peaceful thing I can think of is a little kid sleeping. Fortunately, I have a little sister at my house, so I sneaked a picture of her after she fell asleep tonight. I love listening to her heavy breathing when she sleeps. It's so steady, and all of the little snorts and sniffles are rather endearing. :)

The photo is pretty dark since I didn't want to use the flash and wake her up (that definitely would have disturbed the peace in my house!), but I think the darkness adds to the serenity of the picture. Quiet and peaceful. Makes me want to get some sleep myself!

Here is what Peace looks like to me:

Close to Perfection

Reasons why I love days like today:

Sleeping in.

Sunshine.

Starbucks Mocha Frappuccinos.

A soft breeze.

My brand-new 2011 World Series Champs Cardinals T-shirt.

Beautiful daffodils poking up out of the ground.

The color yellow in general.

That moment when you realize that all of nature around you is transforming from yucky, dead brown into dazzling, fresh green.

Random water fights with my siblings.

Sweet potato fries.

Dreaming of Disney World. 

Evening walks.

Sunsets happening later and later in the day.

March Madness.

Baking cupcakes.

Writing.

So thankful for today! I just can't help but smile. :)

No More "Eenie Meenie Miney Mo"

Decisions, decisions...

My decision-making abilities have not always been the most admirable. Actually, as a child, they pretty much didn't exist. Any time I was faced with a choice, I was pretty good at pulling out "Eenie Meenie Miney Mo" or one of my personal favorites, "Bubble Gum, Bubble Gum in a Dish," which literally takes you like five hours to choose which movie to watch or which shirt to wear.

 

But eventually, you realize that some of life's decisions just can't be hinged on a silly, little rhyme. Sadly, it can't always work that way. Some choices are just bigger than that. Bigger than catching "a tiger by his toe" until he tells you which college to go to or which career to pick.

 

Well, I'm here to tell you that yes, I make my decisions a little differently now. I put a little more thought into things.

I've been wrestling with a rather big decision for some time now. In order to graduate next spring, I need to complete an internship this summer. I've went back and forth on where I should do it. I've weighed all of the positives and negatives, researched a zillion different possibilities, and spent a whole lot of time in prayer. Yet somehow, my decision didn't seem to be any easier.

You see, here's what I wanted: I wanted God to come in a giant bolt of lightning and write a flaming message in the sky telling me where to go and what to do with my life. I wanted Him to shout down from above in a deep, booming, dramatic voice "Megan, go to "such-and-such!" I wished it could be that easy. That clear. That definite.

But you know, God doesn't work in quite that way. He surely could if He wanted to, but I think He likes the fact that we kind of have to figure things out for ourselves. He gives us all the help we could ever need along the way, but it's in a more subtle and gentle way. It's His still, small voice.

So, I wrestled with my decision some more. I knew where I wanted to go. I wanted to go to Shepherds. That place holds such a special spot in my heart. And I knew that I would really love having the chance to do an internship there. But some things were holding me back. Would I be able to support myself without an income? Would I receive adequate experience for the required college course? Would this internship look good on my resume? Most importantly, does God want me to go somewhere else?

A few Sundays ago, a missionary spoke at our church. I didn't get to hear the message because I was working in the nursery, but my mom heard it. As soon as we got in the car, my mom said, "Megan, you have got to listen to that message." When she heard it, she immediately thought of me and the decision that I was trying to make. So, later that week, I listened to the message online. (For those who may be interested, click here.) It was really good. The missionary, Graham Foran, talked about faith, what it was and what it wasn't. He brought out many valid and thought-provoking points, but the part of his message that hit me the most was his story of how he was called to the mission field.

Mr. Foran said that he had felt like he was being called to be a missionary in Brazil, but he decided to bathe the idea in prayer. He prayed over and over again that if God wanted him to go to Brazil that He would make it very clear. He prayed this for days, but nothing seemed to be happening on God's end. At one point, Mr. Foran realized something. He realized that this desire to go to Brazil to be a missionary and proclaim the gospel was not a desire that the devil would give him. So, if the desire was not from the devil, it had to be from God. Makes sense, right?

So, instead of praying that God would make it very clear if He wanted him to go to Brazil, Mr. Foran prayed something different. He told God that he was going to go to Brazil, and if God didn't want him there, to stop him.

Mr. Foran knew God had placed that desire in his heart. After hearing his story, it made me realize that God had placed a desire in my heart, too. It makes me think of a verse.

"Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart."

 Psalm 37:4

A lot of people misuse this verse to seek their own advantage. They think that if they do what God wants them to do, then He will give them whatever they want. Not exactly. This verse just means that if we are aligned with what God deems as good and right, then our desires will be the same as His desires. We end up wanting the same things for ourselves that God wants for us. The desires coincide.

God gave me the desire to go to Shepherds because that's what God wants for me. Our thoughts are the same. Isn't that so cool? Once I realized that, it was very easy to make my decision. I am going to Shepherds this summer. And I am so excited! I know God has something great planned for me, and I wouldn't want it any other way.

I finally made the decision to step out in faith and follow my desire to go to Shepherds. And that decision was so much easier than any game of "Eenie Meenie Miney Moe" that I've ever played.

Sweet Injustice

"It's not fair!" - Working with 3, 4, and 5-year-olds every week and living with a 6-year-old pretty much guarantees that I hear this phrase on a regular basis. When they don't get to finish a puzzle, when it's not their turn to be the line leader, when someone else is treated differently from them - "It's not fair!" It amazes me how early on this sense of injustice is bred into these little human beings. Often, their application of this perceived injustice is a little off, but they do understand it to some extent. They are seeking out a sense of equality.

When thinking about this topic, I marveled at the number of times that I hear these dear, little ones proclaim that "it's not fair!" But then, it hit me how often I utter something very similar. When someone else in my family uses all of the ink in the printer right before I need to turn in a paper, when a fellow student rips my coat and doesn't apologize, when I get two flat tires at once - "This is so not fair!" I am so incredibly guilty of overusing this phrase. And the sad thing is that most of the time, I'm using it to describe something that's miniscule, petty, or just not worth the drama.

There are many people who probably feel like they have legitimate reasons to claim that life's not fair. When they lose a job, when a friend betrays them, when a loved one passes away - "It's not fair!" These circumstances are heartbreaking and much more worthy of this statement than an unfinished puzzle or a ripped coat. I'm not trying to minimize these difficult trials in any way. But I'm going to be honest: Life's not fair. This is the truth. But I believe we should be thankful for this injustice.

Think about it. The world's justice system and God's justice system. Totally different. In the world's justice system, we are constantly trying to balance things. Equal rights. Equal opportunity. Equal, equal, equal. Now, I'm not trying to say these movements are right or wrong. That's not my point. My point is that we work so hard to make everything the same for everyone.

Think of it like a see-saw. The world's justice system "see-saw" is perfectly balanced. Everyone is positioned carefully on the see-saw, in a line covering all the way from one end to the other end. Each person's position on the see-saw is based on their number of good deeds compared to their number of bad deeds. Depending on the numbers, some people will end up closer to the good side, some people will end up closer to the bad side, and some people will end up somewhere in the middle. The weights on each side counteract each other, and the result is a steady, straight see-saw. Balanced. Uniform. Even.

Now, consider God's justice system. There are two places to sit on God's justice system "see-saw." There's the perfect seat and the imperfect seat. That's it. There's no sitting in the middle on God's see-saw. I can't be in between perfect and imperfect; I'm either one or the other. Period. With this being the case, God's see-saw is grossly unbalanced. Only one Person, Jesus Christ, can sit in the perfect seat, and the rest of the world is crammed into the imperfect seat. The imperfect seat holds so much weight that it rests at rock-bottom while the perfect seat and it's Inhabitant rise sky-high. Terribly disproportionate. Yet, in God's justice system, this is just. Fair. Right.

It is hard for us to grasp this. We want everything to fit our definition of "fair." If a murderer and a candy-store thief stood trial at the same time, we would want the murderer to receive a much harsher punishment, but to God, the sin is the same. It's still sin. On a similar note, a faithful servant of Christ who has been a Christian for 60 years would receive the same acceptance into Heaven as an avid atheist who then professed Christ's name within the last week of his life. Do we frown at this? Do we purse our lips and shake our heads? Why? Maybe because our engrained definition of fairness fed to us by the world dictates that this is not fair. Just. Right.

Here's where it gets good! Think about God's justice system "see-saw" again. Remember how unbalanced it was? Remember how many people were squished together on the imperfect seat? Remember the sole Occupant of the perfect seat? Well, if Christ is the only One who is perfect, and Heaven is reserved for only those who are sinless, how is it that there are people in Heaven today?

God looked at that see-saw. He saw how unbalanced, how disproportionate it was, and He said that it was just. Fair. Right. Jesus Christ, the only perfect Being, sat on the perfect seat, and everyone else sat where they belonged, the imperfect seat. This was right. But God did something. He decided to be "unfair." Mind you, this statement is made using the world's definition of fairness. God has always acted in line with His definition of fairness. He is always just. But if we look at it from the world's perspective, what happened next seems "unfair."

God sent His Son, Jesus Christ, away from that perfect seat down to earth where all the imperfect people lived. Christ lived among us and still remained without sin. But one day, Christ did something for us. He took all the imperfect people's sins, from past, present, and future, and laid them all upon Himself. He sat on that imperfect seat for us, so we might have the chance to accept Him as our Savior and spend eternal life in Heaven, that place of sinless perfection.

God allowed life to be "unfair." It wasn't an accident. It wasn't a back-up plan. It was life, and it was not fair, in a magnificent way. Because life is unfair, Christ died for me. Because life is unfair, the punishment for my sin has been erased. Because life is unfair, I get to go to Heaven, and that is the most beautiful gift anyone could have given me: sweet injustice.

Life's not fair. Thank goodness.

Take Two

Well, if you haven't already noticed, up to this point in time all of my posts have been purely scholastic. Dull, boring, mind-numbing, and worthy of nothing more than a homework grade. So, don't you dare go back and read them. Unless, of course, you get some sort of strange kick out of reading analyses of the Internet. Then, be my guest. But for the rest of you, don't do it. Believe me. You do not want to go down that road of boredom.

But today, my friends, this blog will change.

Disclaimer: I make no promises. What I write may bore you. When I write may be entirely sporadic. Why I write is questionable. How I write can easily change upon a whim.

I will write about what challenges me, encourages me, confuses me, saddens me, changes me, bothers me, excites me, disappoints me, surprises me, and inspires me.

I will write when I feel so led. Or I will write when I don't feel so led, but I make myself do it just for the practice.

Why I write what I write is inexplicable. Some things just can't be pinned down. There are a million different reasons why I am writing this now, and it would be impossible for me to try to figure them all out for you or even admit most of them to myself. But a short, easy answer is to say that I write just for the fun of it.

How I write has a lot to do with my emotions. Am I feeling happy? Sad? Goofy? Sleep-deprived? Energetic? Angry? Motivated? Unmotivated? Nervous? Giddy? Disconnected? Passionate? Inspired? A different mood evokes a different style of writing, and I write whatever comes to me naturally.

This is me. And this is my writing. That's all I have to give. Take it or leave it.